What is our real job as parents? Is it to ensure our kids get good grades? – Maybe. Or is it ensuring we can give them the latest and greatest clothing and devices? Mmmm, not really. When all is said and done, I believe our real job is to keep our kids safe, teach them to be independent, and set them up for success – both online and offline.
As first-generation digital parents, many of us are learning on the job. While we can still glean advice from our own parents on dealing with our teenager’s hormones and driving challenges, there’s no intergenerational wisdom for anything digital. So, it is inevitable that many of us parents feel unsure about how and why to be proactive about online safety.
With four grown boys, 12 nieces and nephews, and almost 13 years in this job talking to families about online safety, I’ve developed a pretty good understanding of how families want to live their lives online, their biggest concerns, and how they value safety and security. Here’s what I’ve learnt:
What Are Parents’ Biggest Concerns?
I’ve often dreamt about wrapping my boys in cotton wool and keeping them away from the real world. But unfortunately, that’s not how it works. The internet definitely has some hugely positive features for teens and tweens but there are some challenges too. Here is what parents are most concerned about:
1. Social Media
Without a doubt, tween and teen social media usage would currently be the biggest concern for most parents. In Australia, there is currently a move to delay children using social media to 16. The Prime Minister is a fan as are many state and territory leaders. There’s no doubt parents are concerned about the impact social media is having on their children’s mental health. Whether dealing with followers, friends, or FOMO (fear of missing out), harassment, or exposure to unhelpful, or even dangerous influencers, parents are worried and often feel helpless about how best to help their kids.
2. Bullying
Parents have every right to be concerned. Cyberbullying does happen. In fact, 1 child in 3 reports being the victim of cyberbullying according to a UNICEF study. And in a study conducted by McAfee in 2022 that does a deep dive into the various types of bullying, there’s no doubt that the problem is still very much a reality.
3. Inappropriate Content
There really isn’t anything you can’t find online. And therein lies the problem. With just a few clicks, a curious, unsupervised 10-year-old could access images and information that would be wildly inappropriate and potentially traumatic. And yes, I’m talking sex, drugs and rock and roll themes! There are things online that little, inexperienced eyes are just not ready for – I am not even sure I am either, to be honest!
4. Screen Time
While I think many parents still find the word screen time a little triggering, I think some parents now realise that not all screen time ‘was created equally’. It’s more about the quality and potential benefit of screen time as opposed to the actual time spent on the screen. For example, playing an interactive, good quality science game as opposed to scrolling on Instagram – clearly the game wins!
However, parents are still very concerned that screen time doesn’t dominate their kids’ lives and adversely affects their kids’ levels of physical activity, face-to-face time with family and friends, and their ability to sleep.
Ramping Up Online Security Is the Best Way To Manage Concerns
While there is no silver bullet here, being proactive about your family’s online security is THE best way of protecting your family members, minimising the risk of unpleasant interactions, and setting them up for a positive online experience. And it will also reduce your stress big time – so it’s a complete no-brainer!!
Here are 5 things you can kick off today that will have a profound impact on your family’s online security:
1. Talk, talk, talk!!
Yes, that’s right – simply talk! Engaging with your kids about their online lives – what they like to do, sites and apps they use and any concerns they have is one of the best ways to keep them safe. As is sharing your own stories. If your kids know that you understand the digital world, they will be far more likely to come to you if they experience any issues at all. And that’s exactly what we want!!
2. Parental Controls and Monitoring
Parental controls can work really well alongside a proactive educational approach to online safety. As well as teaching kids healthy digital habits, they can also help parents monitor usage, set limits, and even keep tabs on their kids’ whereabouts. Gold!! Check out more details here.
3. Social Media Safety
Undertake an audit of all family member’s privacy settings to ensure that are set to the highest level. This will ensure only trusted people can view and interact with your kids’ profiles. Also, remind your kids not to overshare as it could lead to their identities being stolen. And check out McAfee’s Social Privacy Manager which can help you manage more than 100 privacy settings on social media accounts in seconds.
4. Make a Plan In Case of Aggressive Behaviour
As a cup-half-full type, I’m not a fan of negativity but I am a fan of plans. So, I do recommend creating an action plan for your kids in case they encounter something tricky online, in particular bullying or aggressive behaviour. I recommend you tell them to take screenshots, disengage, tell someone they trust (ideally you), and report the behaviour to the relevant social media platform or app. In some cases, you could involve your child’s school however this obviously depends on the perpetrator.
5. Passwords please!
I know you have probably heard it before, but password management is such a powerful way of staying safe online. In an ideal world, every online account should have its own unique password. Why? Well, if your logins get stolen in a data breach then the cybercriminals will not be able to reuse them to log into any of your other accounts.
And while you’re at it, ensure all passwords are at least 8-10 characters long, and contain random symbols, numbers and both upper and lowercase letters. If all is too hard, simply engage a password manager that will both generate and remember all the passwords for you. What a relief!
And of course, it goes without saying that a big part of being safe online is having super-duper internet protection software that will give you (and your family members) the best chance of a safe and secure online experience. McAfee+’s family plans not only give you a secure VPN, 24/7 identity and financial monitoring and alerts but AI-powered text scam detection and advanced anti-virus that will protect each of your family members from fake texts, risky links, viruses, malware and more. Sounds like a plan to me!!
Till next time
Stay safe everyone!
Alex
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